Without The Beautiful

With a flutter and a flash of color

she was gone.

A last reminder,
disappearing into day.
The airs turned cold.
So to the South you will fly.

Leaving us

to face the Winter alone
without the beautiful hues you bear.
Your disappearance
heralds the death of flora and fauna.
Of the white that covers
and conceals.
But in the shining light of sun,
we shared and touched.
And as Autumn gives forth to
Winter.
I will hold your memory tight
to warm my heart
Against the
cold...

Counting Months

My envy has reached new levels anguish.
Knowing they can see you.
In the flesh...

Reminders of you,
haunt my day and nights.
Not even my dreams are safe...

You are gone.
And nothing but your return
will heal this pain.

I fill my day with...
Anything and everything!
In the hopes that your memory
will not rise within.

It is a wasted effort.
For wrapped around my heart
you are.

Counting down the days
to your return,
brings me Joy and heartache.
The longing builds
and rises
till it Burns!

So at last I wait.
Counting months
and days
and hours
and minute.

Bravely facing the empty
till at last,
your Touch is Real...

Notes and Beat

Moved as I was...
by rhythm, light and sound.
Transported to a time
long since past.

I find you there...

You see,
I lost you somewhere between
yesterday and tomorrow.

Yet, here in memory invoked,
I see your face.
Intoxicated by music and other joys,
we moved as one.
It was here you danced your way
past my pain and sorrow.
Filling me with Hope, Lights and vodka.
Laughing, as we shared our dreams
and untold passions...

But now you are gone?

But the notes and beat of the song call.
So I answer.
And dance with you once again,
If only in my soul...

Back To Light

Felt, it was...
Anguish pealed from soul,
left empty by words so cruel!
I watch in horror,
as the abuse pours onwards.

This battle is not my own.
Yet...
I weep with you as love dies.
Longing, as I do,
To heal the broken.

Your Light, that once shined
so bright...
Flickers in the wind of anger.
Crushing you soulless.

Yet, the lights still there!
Granted,
it's buried deep.
But you, of all I know...
Know the way back.

Having pulled me up and out
of my own
Abyss.

So breathe,
and take my hand.

And let me...
(And others)
Lead you back to light!

Angry Patience

I linger towards the wake of silence.

          Basking in the lack of noise.
Finding solace is a handmade creature,
       sculptured with tools I nearly understand.

This reprocessing of my life,
     and mind,
           and soul,
requires a dedication unlike anything
      I have done before!

Awkward and unsettled,
      I stumble towards my goal.
Sorting out the cracked and shattered pieces.
     Organizing the subtle from the obvious .

No longer can I just dump it in the box and run...
      Upended, it has become.

So with angry patience and calming frustration,
       I assemble a life I can finally

               live with.

Place?

There is a place.
(So buried deep in my heart)
That you are there.
My wants and needs are filled.
And all is...
But Thursday says it isn't.
And today won't work at all...
All that know say no,
But the return button says...
I love you.  ?   !  ?  .....
And yet I can't.
There is this place...

You Love Me?

Balance...
Or so it seems.
Reconciling the truth as I see it,
with the one you hold so dear...
The vilifying touch of your beliefs crush
my heart and soul.
Madness
Yet the beauty of your heart shines!
Your caring is real.
But still you believe...
In direct opposition is all that I hold dear.
But still you love me?
And I love you!
So I agree to disagree...
And leave you to your faith.
Holding tighter and tighter to mine.